A New Year!
A time of rebirth! A time for checking in with ourselves and exploring what we want! A time for New Year Resolutions! A time to start making all those changes to ourselves that will make us better – better people, better partners, better parents, more successful at work, better at sports, richer, slimmer, healthier. The list is endless!
Appraisal of where we are and where we want to go is of course valuable. If we don’t know where we want to be there is no way we can get there. So, goals and targets are important. There is no doubt that sometimes there are serious issues that need to be addressed, behaviours that need to be explored and modified; particularly those which are harmful to ourselves or others.
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However, by their very nature new years’ resolutions focus on the future, involving lots of effort. As someone once said “The past is history and the future is a mystery”. All we really have is now! If we are so focused on goals for the future the danger is that we don’t experience the present moment! And once the moment passes it is gone forever. An alternate resolution would be to appreciate the here and now, to savour this moment!
Sometimes we can put so much effort into trying to make ourselves better in the future that we can lose touch with who we actually are. We are human beings. As well as strengths, we also have wounded, weak and incomplete parts. We are not perfect! We cannot be! No amount of effort is going to make us so!
So, New Year is a time to take a fresh look – at ourselves, our lives and those around us – the positives as well as the negatives, the aspects of our lives that we can be grateful for, the parts of ourselves that we are satisfied with! What are we already doing that feels right? What are we doing that gives us a sense of happiness?
Maybe this New Year of 2017 we can decide to take an honest look at ourselves as imperfect human beings with both challenges and strengths. As well as resolving to change what we really feel needs to change we can also resolve to accept ourselves as we are, to notice our abilities as well as our difficulties, to see ourselves as innately good people who are doing the best we can, to be compassionate to ourselves.
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A new year is also time to touch base with our dreams. Visualise the future, life at its best. Dare to dream – it just might happen!
A healthy and peaceful New Year to everyone.
About the author: Evelyn Burke is a Psychotherapist & Counsellor with over ten years experience, who is in practice with AnneLeigh Counselling & Psychotherapy in Naas. If you would like to make an appointment with her please contact her on 087 4196675 or 085 1050337.